When I heard the news Robin Williams had died…

Robin Williams

When I heard the news Robin Williams had died, I was shocked, shaken & saddened… And hoped it was a horrid hoax.  Seconds later, I learned that it was possibly suicide… And hoped that wasn’t the case either…

I’m not making fun of his death by any means, but honestly, oddly,  I started wishing to hear it was an accident, a homicide, something gone awry, or that it was a way to avoid some disease we didn’t know about… Besides depression. If Robin Williams, with all his success, all his talent, all his fans and I’d imagine resources… If he wasn’t able to beat back the dark, and defeat the blues, what chance do we, without his level of success, have?

I hope the press honors his family, and leaves them alone, my deepest condolences to them and his close friends… I had always wished that I would have had the opportunity to have worked with Mr. Williams.  His humor, genius and humanity on screen (and I’m sure off screen) was inspiring, brilliant and touched so many…

A friend reached out to me today… Checking in… Wanting me to make me promise to reach out if I ever feel that level of despair… But I think that’s part of the problem, as tragically, I’ve have known many friends who have taken their own lives…

I’m no expert, but it seems when people are that far in, they can’t see reason, they’re not thinking of life lines, the pain they’ll cause others or making phone calls… I’ve reached out to a few friends today, who I know also, on occasion, battle the black dog… And hope to reach a few more with this posting…

Hello. How are you doing?

– Quiche Out


1 Comment »

  1. I am really glad that you say these things. Your willingness to be very human and proud of it will surely encourage others to stop thinking they are alone. Faking it sucks.

    These are things I have learned. If I am not accurate, I hope I am corrected.
    Depression is real and it affects a whole lot of people, including many who don’t even know it. Depression is not the blues. It’s not sadness or hurt feelings, or sulking or grieving. Depression is a chemical combination in the brain that precludes one from plugging away at everyday routines, and basically from just moving at all. If you find yourself crying or feeling uncomfortably emotional, it’s not the depression you are feeling, it’s a reaction to watching yourself be in that state and not being able to save yourself from it, but also not willing to tell anyone that you are experiencing it. Sadness is the manifestation of realizing you are depressed. Depression is treatable, but seeking help requires the motivation that is depleted by depression. Knowing that highly successful beloved people suffer from it makes it more comfortable to face it, but it is also helpful to understand that it is not caused by negative feedback, or bad events or emotionally-challenging situations, it is a condition that occurs in your brain due to a chemical imbalance and it has no noticeable symptoms that others can see. It just keeps you from doing what you should be doing. When a person sees himself in this situation, he gets sad, and that is why sadness is so often thought to be synonymous with depression.

    Many comedians suffer from depression. It was not shocking to me that Robin Williams died in this manner, but that is not around anymore. That’s what jolts me. It was planned and executed in a way that only a person who had resolved to do it would have done it. He was most likely in a happy, content mood the entire day because of the relief he knew he was going to have. This is why loved ones rarely see it coming. He didn’t hang himself in the conventional way where you are found hanging, he intentionally pressed his airway against the belt around his neck in a slumped position until he passed out, the limpness and his weight did the rest of the work. This is the method of a person who is very serious about living no more. He could have changed his mind for a grueling minute or so and simply stood up straight, but he did not. There was no way he was going to let himself live another day. He got to decide when where and how he was going to exit. The method he chose is a precise one that suggests he spent some time researching before he made a decision.

    I hope his family, friends and fans can be happy for him, because if they are not, they have failed to show that they respect his needs and love him regardless. He wanted this. It was what he wanted more than anything in the world. He got it. He was a good man. I’m glad he lived. I feel for his surviving family and friends.

    Thank you, Tom, for your post on this. It is most meaningful and truly thoughtful. I hope I didn’t chatter too much.


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